Mamacesto (original poster member #61938) posted at 2:15 AM on Friday, September 19th, 2025
Something very concerning to me! I thought these forums were "private" to members only? Just for kicks, I searched my username on the internet and was shocked when it brought up links to some of my posts in Surviving Infidelity!! Is there anyway to get those deleted?
Me - BW -51 (at time of A)
WH - 59 (at time of A)
OW - 42 (at time of A)
D-Day #1 EA/PA 10-02-17;
D-Day #2 EA 10-14-18
M - 24 yrs (at time of A)
...attempting R
OhItsYou ( member #84125) posted at 5:13 AM on Friday, September 19th, 2025
Not really. Search engine have bots that categorize everything. Even forums that are completely private, google has software that punches right through that.
Bigger ( Attaché #8354) posted at 12:51 PM on Friday, September 19th, 2025
As far as anonymity goes having a user name like Bigger on infidelity related sites makes it easy to hide in the immense forest of search-results!
I can share that the mods do veto some user names if they are considered too close to a possible real name. Like if the user name was John_Smith it would probably be refused.
"If, therefore, any be unhappy, let him remember that he is unhappy by reason of himself alone." Epictetus
torso1500 ( new member #83345) posted at 4:44 PM on Friday, September 19th, 2025
No the forum is not members-only private. You can read it while not logged into an account, so you can assume it is crawled and cached. Sorry you were under an incorrect impression. You can remove what you have written but unfortunately you may not be able to purge all cached evidence of your participation.
sisoon ( Moderator #31240) posted at 9:09 PM on Friday, September 19th, 2025
Editing posts is OK. Deleting them violates a guideline.
My SI username is unlike any other usernames I've ever used. I know some people don't think of that. You can change your username if you get a premium membership.
If anybody wonders about it, mods and guides do not have the power to see anyone's email address, except their own.
No one on staff can find you based on your username alone, especially if you use a one-off email address. That's a problem if someone posts about considering suicide. We cannot find you to call your local 911 number.
fBH (me) - on d-day: 66, Married 43, together 45, same sex apDDay - 12/22/2010Recover'd and R'edYou don't have to like your boundaries. You just have to set and enforce them.
